https://www.bustle.com/p/heres-how-youre-most-likely-to-get-your-heart-broken-based-on-your-zodiac-sign-8485010
When I first decided I wanted to become a digital nomad — someone who travels non-stop while working remotely — I was terrified and unsure if I would actually go through with it. I worried my work would suffer from all the travel and time zone changes, I didn’t know how much it would cost, and I knew there’d be logistical complications I didn’t even anticipate. Then, out of sheer luck, I met Chris Backe, a coach for current and aspiring digital nomads, through a digital nomad Facebook group. Over the course of two Skype conversations, he helped me figure out how to get my ducks in a row and realize I definitely wanted to do it. So, it’s very fitting that Backe is now the author of Becoming a Digital Nomad: Your Step By Step Guide To The Digital Nomad Lifestyle, which can give aspiring nomads the information and encouragement Backe gave me, and more.
If you’re thinking of becoming a nomad, this is Backe’s advice: “Go into this with the same mindset you have when you're dating — take it slow, use your brain, trust your gut,” he tells Bustle. “If it's a fit, go to the next step. Better to go slow and make a thought-out decision than to make one you'll regret later on. It's pretty easy to test the lifestyle, though — make your way to the next state/province/country over, rent an Airbnb, and start making a new routine for yourself.”
The path toward becoming a digital nomad is a long and winding one, and you’ll have to read the whole book to get a comprehensive grasp of it. But in case you’re curious what the whole process is about, here are the basic steps Backe lays out. He also created a series of worksheets to help people through their digital nomad journeys, which are publicly available online and hyperlinked below.
Here's How You’re Most Likely To Get Your Heart Broken, Based On Your Zodiac Sign
Getting your heart broken can be one of the most painful experiences you can have in your life. But if you're into astrology, being familiar with your zodiac sign can be pretty helpful. For instance, when you know the ways you're likely to get your heart broken based on your zodiac sign, you can use that info to help guide you in your relationships moving forward.
As you probably know, each zodiac sign has a particular set of traits that make them unique. So just as some signs are more likely to have multiple soulmates or cheat on their partners, astrologers say a select few are more likely to get their hearts broken than everyone else. As astrologer Suzie Kerr Wright, tells Bustle, Scorpio, Pisces, Cancer, and Libra are most prone to the "real, ugly-cry" type of heartbreak.
"Scorpios get their hearts broken a lot because they expect such an intense connection and many partners may end up breaking their hearts by just ghosting them," Wright says. As for the other signs, Pisces want the idealistic fairytale-type of romance, Cancers tend to attract immature partners, and Libras tend to go all-in from the very beginning while their partners are still "seeing where it goes."
That being said, it's always important to remember that not everyone will identify completely with their sign. Although different zodiac signs have different attributes, not all characteristics or outcomes may pertain to you. Instead, the zodiac should be used as a guide to help with self-reflection, and offer further insights into the qualities you do identify with.
While these four signs are most prone to certain types of heartbreak, no one is immune to it. So here are the ways you're most likely to get your heart broken, based on your zodiac sign.
As you probably know, each zodiac sign has a particular set of traits that make them unique. So just as some signs are more likely to have multiple soulmates or cheat on their partners, astrologers say a select few are more likely to get their hearts broken than everyone else. As astrologer Suzie Kerr Wright, tells Bustle, Scorpio, Pisces, Cancer, and Libra are most prone to the "real, ugly-cry" type of heartbreak.
"Scorpios get their hearts broken a lot because they expect such an intense connection and many partners may end up breaking their hearts by just ghosting them," Wright says. As for the other signs, Pisces want the idealistic fairytale-type of romance, Cancers tend to attract immature partners, and Libras tend to go all-in from the very beginning while their partners are still "seeing where it goes."
That being said, it's always important to remember that not everyone will identify completely with their sign. Although different zodiac signs have different attributes, not all characteristics or outcomes may pertain to you. Instead, the zodiac should be used as a guide to help with self-reflection, and offer further insights into the qualities you do identify with.
While these four signs are most prone to certain types of heartbreak, no one is immune to it. So here are the ways you're most likely to get your heart broken, based on your zodiac sign.
1Aries (March 21 - April 19): Being With Someone Who Wastes Their Time
Aries is definitely not known for being the most patient zodiac sign and that can be seen in the way they go about relationships. "Aries dive in head first when they meet someone that impresses them," astrologer Cindy Mckean, tells Bustle. "But if you hit the bottom too quickly, you will likely get your heart broken."
Besides that, as an Aries, the most "precious currency" you hold is time. "If someone tells you to 'just wait for it,' and it never happens, forget it," astrologer Judi Vitale, tells Bustle. "You’re shattered." You need a partner who truly values you and won't waste your time.
Although Aries do experience their fair share of heartbreak, the good news is, they're a sign who's more proactive when it comes to ending a relationship. If they run out of patience waiting for their partner to be all in, they're out. "They may find that once the new wears off, they're just not as excited about that individual anymore," Wright says. "After a while, they move on."
Besides that, as an Aries, the most "precious currency" you hold is time. "If someone tells you to 'just wait for it,' and it never happens, forget it," astrologer Judi Vitale, tells Bustle. "You’re shattered." You need a partner who truly values you and won't waste your time.
Although Aries do experience their fair share of heartbreak, the good news is, they're a sign who's more proactive when it comes to ending a relationship. If they run out of patience waiting for their partner to be all in, they're out. "They may find that once the new wears off, they're just not as excited about that individual anymore," Wright says. "After a while, they move on."
2Taurus (April 20 - May 20): Holding On To Past Hurts And Mistakes Their Partner Makes
Taurus is known for being very protective and kind of possessive. "For [Taurus], not being able to protect what is dear to you is utter disaster," Vitale says. "While you mourn the passing of relationships, you get even more deeply wounded when someone steals from you."
But that's not all. Moving on from anything hurtful a Taurus' partner may do can also be pretty difficult for them. "The bulls of the zodiac have a long memory," Mckean says. "Sometimes Taurus has a tendency to hold on to past hurts from a partner for too long, even after the dust has settled." Although another Taurus might understand this, Mckean says it might turn off any other sign. "Don't break your own heart by stubbornly holding on to a past mistake," she says.
But that's not all. Moving on from anything hurtful a Taurus' partner may do can also be pretty difficult for them. "The bulls of the zodiac have a long memory," Mckean says. "Sometimes Taurus has a tendency to hold on to past hurts from a partner for too long, even after the dust has settled." Although another Taurus might understand this, Mckean says it might turn off any other sign. "Don't break your own heart by stubbornly holding on to a past mistake," she says.
3Gemini (May 21 - June 20): Being With A Partner Who Doesn't "Get" How They Are In Relationships
Geminis have real, deep feelings but they may never know it, Wright says. Sometimes a Gemini will talk a lot about what they'll do for you, but they might not ever get to it. "They have a really difficult time expressing deep love, so unless they're involved with someone who they've connected with on an intellectual level, they may wake up one day and find their partner has blocked their texts and moved on," she says.
That's why Mckean says the best advice for them is to be vulnerable. "Even though Gemini is the sign of the twins, you have only one heart. Allowing yourself to be more vulnerable is the key to avoiding a broken heart."
That's why Mckean says the best advice for them is to be vulnerable. "Even though Gemini is the sign of the twins, you have only one heart. Allowing yourself to be more vulnerable is the key to avoiding a broken heart."
4Cancer (June 21 - July 22): Being With A Partner Who Lacks Maturity
"Cancers tend to get their hearts broken by immature partners," Wright says. Cancers are very nurturing by nature and they love taking care of the people they love most. Immature partners will take a Cancer's care for granted. "They may find Cancer to be 'too much' sometimes and will resent being smothered," she says. That's when they're likely to cheat or leave.
They can't help it — Cancer is known for being a very sensitive sign. Because of that, Vitale says, "disappointment is a frequent state of mind for you." When you give your all to someone, and expect reciprocation that never comes, that can be super heartbreaking for you.
But don't allow those disappointments to turn you off from connecting with people. As Mckean says, "Being too self-protective will be the very thing that gives you a broken heart." If Cancer can honestly communicate their feelings, they might find a way to work it out.
They can't help it — Cancer is known for being a very sensitive sign. Because of that, Vitale says, "disappointment is a frequent state of mind for you." When you give your all to someone, and expect reciprocation that never comes, that can be super heartbreaking for you.
But don't allow those disappointments to turn you off from connecting with people. As Mckean says, "Being too self-protective will be the very thing that gives you a broken heart." If Cancer can honestly communicate their feelings, they might find a way to work it out.
5Leo (July 23 - August 22): Being With Someone Who Fails To Recognize How Amazing They Are
Leos love being the center of attention. And why not? They're awesome, they know it, and they make no secret of out it. But when they get all dressed up with their hair just right and their significant other doesn’t see anything special about them, Vitale says, "it can make [them] feel like [their] heart’s been trampled by a set of jack boots."
They're fun-loving and just love being in love. It can sometimes seem like nothing can bring them down. "Ruled by the Sun, the only time your heart is truly broken is when no one recognizes how bright you shine," Mckean says. In that case, it's important for Leo to let their partner know how much being recognized means to them.
They're fun-loving and just love being in love. It can sometimes seem like nothing can bring them down. "Ruled by the Sun, the only time your heart is truly broken is when no one recognizes how bright you shine," Mckean says. In that case, it's important for Leo to let their partner know how much being recognized means to them.
6Virgo (August 23 - September 22): Feeling Like They Don't Matter
Virgo really enjoys doing things for other people, Vitale says. It's what they thrive on. "So, when a friend or family member says, 'No thanks, I’d rather do it myself,' it’s like they’re telling you that you don’t really matter," she says. For Virgo, that's pretty heartbreaking.
When it comes to romantic relationships, Virgo is a perfectionist. They're someone who really knows what they want and won't settle for anything less. "When you find someone that checks all the boxes, you might think you found the perfect partner, but that isn't always synonymous with a perfect match," Mckean says. "Steadfast and dedicated, you get your heart broken by staying too long with someone who isn't really perfect for you." For Virgo, it's important to recognize that there isn't just one soulmate out there for them. If something's not working after they've tried their best, then it's OK to let go.
When it comes to romantic relationships, Virgo is a perfectionist. They're someone who really knows what they want and won't settle for anything less. "When you find someone that checks all the boxes, you might think you found the perfect partner, but that isn't always synonymous with a perfect match," Mckean says. "Steadfast and dedicated, you get your heart broken by staying too long with someone who isn't really perfect for you." For Virgo, it's important to recognize that there isn't just one soulmate out there for them. If something's not working after they've tried their best, then it's OK to let go.
7Libra (September 23 - October 22): Expecting Too Much From Their Partner And Avoiding Conflict
Libras are ruled by Venus, so they know what love is all about. "Libra is a dual sign and always wants to be partnered and in love," Mckean says. "You can have a tendency to be with a person who isn't right for you, which can lead to a broken heart."
Besides that, Libra expects full commitment. That means a lot of togetherness and a ton of communication from their partner. In reality, that can be a bit hard to live up to. Then again, Libra also tends to shy away from confrontation, so their partner might not know how they're truly feeling.
"Libras get their hearts broken because they avoid any conflict," Wright says. "With all the communication, you may find you never get to the heart of any problem." It's important to communicate. Fighting in the right way can make a relationship stronger. If Libra doesn't let their partner know what's wrong, they might be the one left brokenhearted.
Besides that, Libra expects full commitment. That means a lot of togetherness and a ton of communication from their partner. In reality, that can be a bit hard to live up to. Then again, Libra also tends to shy away from confrontation, so their partner might not know how they're truly feeling.
"Libras get their hearts broken because they avoid any conflict," Wright says. "With all the communication, you may find you never get to the heart of any problem." It's important to communicate. Fighting in the right way can make a relationship stronger. If Libra doesn't let their partner know what's wrong, they might be the one left brokenhearted.
8Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): When A Partner Lies
Scorpios can be intense and they expect their partner to be completely loyal and honest with them. That's why Vitale says that the one way for someone to truly break their heart is by lying. Although they like being secretive themselves, Scorpio doesn't want a partner who keeps things from them.
Giving in to the "darker side" of their sign by being too secretive, suspicious, or demanding will also have a way of breaking their heart. But according to Mckean, there is good news. Scorpios learn from past mistakes, "so your next partner will be what love is all about," she says.
Giving in to the "darker side" of their sign by being too secretive, suspicious, or demanding will also have a way of breaking their heart. But according to Mckean, there is good news. Scorpios learn from past mistakes, "so your next partner will be what love is all about," she says.
9Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): Being With A Partner Who Isn't Adventurous
"Sag's get their hearts broken because they tend to be attracted to the unattainable," Wright says. Sagittarius loves adventures and they're always on the go. That can take a toll on a relationship if their partner isn't as down to move around as they are. "Being with you can be a roller coaster ride and not everyone is capable of staying on."
But there is a plus side here. As Mckean says, Sagittarius is not only adventurous, but also optimistic. "You're always looking forward, so you will find a new love just beyond the horizon."
But there is a plus side here. As Mckean says, Sagittarius is not only adventurous, but also optimistic. "You're always looking forward, so you will find a new love just beyond the horizon."
10Capricorn (December 22 - January 19): Being With A Partner Who Doesn't Understand Their Practicality
When it comes to work relationships, being under-appreciated is the worst thing that can happen to Capricorn. "You always do what you believe is your best, especially at work, so having your finest suggestions ignored is a real heartbreaker," Vitale says.
Capricorn is just a really grounded and practical sign, and work and finances is super important to them. So where does that leave relationships? "Your serious, practical, and determined qualities are great at getting past obstacles; however, when it comes to love, even a partner willing to accompany you towards your goals will feel the lack of romance and find pinker pastures elsewhere," Mckean says. "Capricorns are known for reverse aging, so perhaps waiting till you're older is going to help you avoid a broken heart."
Capricorn is just a really grounded and practical sign, and work and finances is super important to them. So where does that leave relationships? "Your serious, practical, and determined qualities are great at getting past obstacles; however, when it comes to love, even a partner willing to accompany you towards your goals will feel the lack of romance and find pinker pastures elsewhere," Mckean says. "Capricorns are known for reverse aging, so perhaps waiting till you're older is going to help you avoid a broken heart."
11Aquarius (January 20 - February 18): Being With Someone Who Doesn't Appreciate Their Uniqueness
"Your heart breaks when other people fail to understand why you wouldn’t be you without the freedom to dance passionately to that different drummer," Vitale says. Aquarius is an air sign that loves being different. So if they're with someone who can't appreciate that, it can be pretty heartbreaking for them.
One of their best qualities is how go with the flow they are. "Your charm ... can keep someone in love with you hooked for a long time," Mckean says. The only downside is, Aquarius' focus is often not on the person they're involved with. "One too many forgotten dates is how you can break your own heart once you realize that your partner has slammed the door and locked it on the way out." So if they really want to be with someone, be with them. Have fun and do you, Aquarius, but don't forget your partner. When you're with them, always be mindful to stay present.
One of their best qualities is how go with the flow they are. "Your charm ... can keep someone in love with you hooked for a long time," Mckean says. The only downside is, Aquarius' focus is often not on the person they're involved with. "One too many forgotten dates is how you can break your own heart once you realize that your partner has slammed the door and locked it on the way out." So if they really want to be with someone, be with them. Have fun and do you, Aquarius, but don't forget your partner. When you're with them, always be mindful to stay present.
12Pisces (February 19 - March 20): Being In A Relationship That Doesn't Live Up To Their Expectations
"Pisces get their hearts broken because, to put it simply, they can be highly unrealistic when it comes to relationships," Wright says. Pisces wants the fairy tales, the love stories like in romance novels or at least something that looks like that.
Although they're good at getting out of bad relationships quickly and quietly, Mckean says, the romantic side of Pisces might keep those rose-colored glasses on a little too long sometimes. "If someone keeps on stomping on your dreams, your heart will be broken," she says. While it's OK to have expectations for their relationship, Pisces should try to be realistic about it. If their relationship isn't making them happy, it's important to figure out what needs to be done in order to get them there.
Everyone will experience heartbreak at some point. But if you know what breaks your heart the most, you'll know how to avoid it or figure out the best way to overcome it and move forward.
Although they're good at getting out of bad relationships quickly and quietly, Mckean says, the romantic side of Pisces might keep those rose-colored glasses on a little too long sometimes. "If someone keeps on stomping on your dreams, your heart will be broken," she says. While it's OK to have expectations for their relationship, Pisces should try to be realistic about it. If their relationship isn't making them happy, it's important to figure out what needs to be done in order to get them there.
Everyone will experience heartbreak at some point. But if you know what breaks your heart the most, you'll know how to avoid it or figure out the best way to overcome it and move forward.
How To Stay Positive While Dating, According To Matchmakers
With every first date that leads to nowhere or every non-relationship that ends up being a waste of your time, finding love can seem far from possible. It can also be pretty rough on your self-esteem if you continually put a lot of effort into dating without getting much back in return. But you shouldn't let dating drag you down. According to matchmakers, there are ways you can stay positive when single, and dating is making you all sorts of frustrated.
"The pressures of dating stem from the need to uphold a dating mask," Julie Armet, Director of Operations at matchmaking service, Tawkify, tells Bustle. "We all fall into the game of dress-up, with social masks being one of the greatest blocks to establishing true intimacy."
It's true. How many times have you been advised to be yourself, but only the best version of yourself, when you're on a date? The same applies to dating profiles. While it would be great for everyone to be their authentic selves online, that's not typically the case. People usually showcase the highlights of themselves online because it's important to stand out in the best way possible. Pretending to be this perfect version of yourself can be exhausting, especially if none of your dates actually end up turning into something more.
That's why, if you really want to stay empowered when you're looking for love, Armet says, stop dating and start connecting. "Human-to-human vulnerability is the natural consequence of two people allowing their inner selves to shine," she says.
So here are the best ways to stay empowered when dating is bringing you down, according to matchmakers:
"The pressures of dating stem from the need to uphold a dating mask," Julie Armet, Director of Operations at matchmaking service, Tawkify, tells Bustle. "We all fall into the game of dress-up, with social masks being one of the greatest blocks to establishing true intimacy."
It's true. How many times have you been advised to be yourself, but only the best version of yourself, when you're on a date? The same applies to dating profiles. While it would be great for everyone to be their authentic selves online, that's not typically the case. People usually showcase the highlights of themselves online because it's important to stand out in the best way possible. Pretending to be this perfect version of yourself can be exhausting, especially if none of your dates actually end up turning into something more.
That's why, if you really want to stay empowered when you're looking for love, Armet says, stop dating and start connecting. "Human-to-human vulnerability is the natural consequence of two people allowing their inner selves to shine," she says.
So here are the best ways to stay empowered when dating is bringing you down, according to matchmakers:
1Start Saying "Yes" To The Things That Scare You
If dating has become an endless cycle of the same thing every time, start saying yes to things that will push you out of your comfort zone. For instance, if your co-workers invite you out on a weeknight, say yes. Better yet, change the distance settings on your dating app. If someone asks you to come visit them in their city, don't be afraid to go for it if you're really connecting with the person.
"This will change your relationship with others and yourself," Michal Naisteter, Philadelphia-based matchmaker at Three Day Rule tells Bustle. "Think Year of Yes by Shonda Rimes. A practice like this will bleed into all areas of your life and will open yourself up to new experiences as well as your own empowerment."
"This will change your relationship with others and yourself," Michal Naisteter, Philadelphia-based matchmaker at Three Day Rule tells Bustle. "Think Year of Yes by Shonda Rimes. A practice like this will bleed into all areas of your life and will open yourself up to new experiences as well as your own empowerment."
2Be Grateful For The Life You Already Have
You probably hear this a lot, but start a gratitude journal. Whether you like it or not, Naisteter says a gratitude journal will reshape your thinking fairly quickly. You can spend time once a day or once a week reflecting on what's good in your life or what went well that day. "Some people do it at night by writing in a journal, putting notes in a jar or just thinking the ideas out loud," she says. "These positive ripples will slowly affect your week and your dating life."
It doesn't have to be a difficult or long process. As Professional Matchmaker with Tawkify, Alyssa Bunn, tells Bustle, just spend one minute looking for three to five positive things that happened each day. "Gratitude not only helps us feel more confident, but it's scientifically-proven to help us win new relationships," she says.
When you're more grateful for the life you already have, you're more likely to see dating as a fun way to meet new people and not a challenging task that isn't going anywhere for you.
It doesn't have to be a difficult or long process. As Professional Matchmaker with Tawkify, Alyssa Bunn, tells Bustle, just spend one minute looking for three to five positive things that happened each day. "Gratitude not only helps us feel more confident, but it's scientifically-proven to help us win new relationships," she says.
When you're more grateful for the life you already have, you're more likely to see dating as a fun way to meet new people and not a challenging task that isn't going anywhere for you.
3Don't Approach Dating Like A Part-Time Job
"A lot of people approach dating like a part time job," Michela Hattabaugh, Chicago-based matchmaker with Three Day Rule, tells Bustle. Meaning, they'll shoot for a certain amount of dates per week and spend a good amount of time on various dating apps a day. When dating becomes something you have to do each week, it's going to burn you out. It can also kill your confidence when you're not hitting certain goals you've set for yourself each week.
While it’s true you need to make time for dating, make sure you’re also building in some "me" time, Hattabaugh says. Take a yoga class or do something relaxing to help clear your mind and boost your sense of well-being. "Adding in a few hours a week to focus on relaxation will improve your overall mood," she says.
While it’s true you need to make time for dating, make sure you’re also building in some "me" time, Hattabaugh says. Take a yoga class or do something relaxing to help clear your mind and boost your sense of well-being. "Adding in a few hours a week to focus on relaxation will improve your overall mood," she says.
4Remember That Dating Is About You Too
Many people tend to feel like dating is about whether or not they appeal to the other person. But as Hattabaugh says, "It takes two to tango. You should approach dates with confidence." Instead of thinking, "I hope they like me or I hope I don't act too nervous or weird," think, "Does this person have the kind personality that I deserve in a partner?" Self-defeating thoughts will only bring you down and affect your overall demeanor. "Always remember that you’re a catch and approach the date with that mindset," she says. It's all about loving yourself first.
5Chart A Path To Forgiveness
If you have trouble believing that you are enough and the right person really is out there for you, you may need to dig into your past to heal some wounds you probably didn't know you still had. "Think about what has hurt your heart in the past and be intentional about forgiveness," Bunn says. "Forgiveness creates hope that the past could be different. Until you fully heal, your past dating wounds will fester, clouding your judgment and obstructing your growth."
6Recognize That You Hold The Power
"You don't need to be empowered, you already have the power," Professional Matchmaker with Tawkify, Melissa Roy, tells Bustle. Don't fall into that trap of thinking another person has the upper hand on your happiness. "You get to choose who you spend time with and who you want to be intimate with," she says. "That's what dating is all about and it's awesome."
7Don't Be Afraid To Tell It Like It Is
"If you really want to be empowered, speak up," Professional Emissary at Tawkify, Evyenia Trembois, tells Bustle. This comes in the form of choosing the date location yourself, picking out a place you've been curious to try, or ending the date early after coming to the conclusion that it's not a match.
Furthermore, own your time. As Professional Matchmaker at Tawkify, Sophy Singer tells Bustle, "Shut down those endless texting sagas that lead nowhere. Create rules and stick to them." Don't entertain people who'll flake on you or can't commit to meeting up for a 15 minute coffee date.
Above all, recognize that you don't ever have to stay in a situation that isn't serving you. "Women are conditioned to be 'polite' in dating situations, even at the cost of our own fun, enjoyment, and time," Trembois says. "But the bottom line is, you really don't owe anyone anything. Have your own back, and do what feels right for you. Thats's empowering AF."
Furthermore, own your time. As Professional Matchmaker at Tawkify, Sophy Singer tells Bustle, "Shut down those endless texting sagas that lead nowhere. Create rules and stick to them." Don't entertain people who'll flake on you or can't commit to meeting up for a 15 minute coffee date.
Above all, recognize that you don't ever have to stay in a situation that isn't serving you. "Women are conditioned to be 'polite' in dating situations, even at the cost of our own fun, enjoyment, and time," Trembois says. "But the bottom line is, you really don't owe anyone anything. Have your own back, and do what feels right for you. Thats's empowering AF."
8Listen To Your "I'm All That" Anthem
Turn on that song that makes you feel like you can take on the world. If you don't have your own personal anthem, "Listen to Beyonce's 'I'm Feelin' Myself,'" Rémy Boyd, Professional Matchmaker with Tawkify, tells Bustle. Apparently, it's the ultimate "I'm all that" anthem that can help shift your mindset to "I'm in the driver's seat." When you have that revitalized confidence, take some new pics, redo your dating profiles and start fresh. "Be the person you'd want to date and you'll start catching the best fish in the sea," Boyd says. "This is the one aspect of dating you can control, so own it!"
9Take It Slow
When you're in a rush to just be in a relationship, it can cause you to settle for someone who might not be the best possible match for you. But relationships are tough and you have the rest of your life to get serious. So spend your time being single to explore your options. "Give yourself the opportunity to meet new people as often as possible and create meaningful friendships," Boyd says. "The best relationships begin with a solid foundation of friendship. Why? Because there's no pressure in the beginning! Slow down and let love happen to you." There's nothing more empowering than realizing your patience really paid off. You didn't let external factors influence your decision to get into a relationship. You took it slow and made the right decision for you.
10Refuse To Give Up
Dating isn't about striving for perfection. "It's about showing up and giving it your all," Bunn says. "When you bring that effort to every date, true love has the ability to fall into place." If you want to stay confident even if your dating life is less than ideal, recognize that you really are worthy of love. A good partner is on their way.
11Don't Be Attached To Any Specific Outcome
Do things that make you feel happy. "Create goals you want to work towards," Caitlin D'Aprano, Professional Matchmaker at Tawkify, tells Bustle. "Self-esteem is built by the things we achieve, not the number of romantic partners we've secured!"
So focus on the positive things that you can bring to a relationship and the positives of being single. Make an effort to meet one new person a week, whether it be a friend, a hook-up, or just anybody. "Don't be attached to a specific outcome and just be in-the-moment with people you meet," she says. "You will find that you're attracting quality people who are naturally drawn to you."
When it comes to dating today, you can pretty much expect disappointments to happen. But stay positive and keep going. As long as you stay confident and true to yourself, you will attract the right partner for you.
So focus on the positive things that you can bring to a relationship and the positives of being single. Make an effort to meet one new person a week, whether it be a friend, a hook-up, or just anybody. "Don't be attached to a specific outcome and just be in-the-moment with people you meet," she says. "You will find that you're attracting quality people who are naturally drawn to you."
When it comes to dating today, you can pretty much expect disappointments to happen. But stay positive and keep going. As long as you stay confident and true to yourself, you will attract the right partner for you.
I Tried Venus' New Facial Hair Removal Device & Will Never Get My Upper Lip Area Waxed Again
BySara Tan
I remember the first time I realized I was growing hair above my upper lip. It was when a very rude seventh grader decided to point it out in front of my friends and me during our lunch break. He wasn't wrong — just mean — and ever since then, I've been religious about making sure my 'stache is basically non-existent, not because of him, but because I personally prefer to keep that area hair-free. Over the years, I've tried pretty much every method to remove facial hair, from waxing and threading (ouch) to my usual go-to, the tiny Japanese razor called the Tinkle. So when Venus decided to create their very first facial hair removal device, my hair and I were game.
The Venus Face Perfection is a handheld gadget that can be used on the sensitive areas of your face, including your chin, upper lip, forehead, and between your eyebrows. It is not a razor, but an epilator that mechanically removes multiple hairs at once. The head of the device features 10 micro-openings that aim to pluck the tiniest, shortest, and finest hairs quickly from your face. It moves in two directions — left and right — so you can remove hair on either sides of your face more easily, depending on how you're holding the device. After using the Venus Face Perfection, the device claims you'll have up to four weeks of smooth, hairless skin.
When I first looked at the device, I wasn't quite sure how I was supposed to use it. It was much smaller than any other epilator device I've ever seen before. To be honest, it did not look very powerful at all and I wasn't convinced it could remove my facial hair the way that it had claimed.
That quickly changed after I turned the device on. The head began to spin super fast — almost too quickly. I was a little afraid to hold the device up to my upper lip area, so following the instructions, I tried it first on my chin to get used to how it felt. I pressed the device down onto my skin and it startled me at first — you can definitely feel the micro-openings snatching up your hairs, like soft little pinches. But after a few seconds, I got used to the sensation and decided to give it a whirl on my mustache area.
I was immediately impressed by how quickly the device worked. In a matter of seconds, my upper lip hairs were completely gone. When I used the device on the left side of my face, I switched the device so that it spun to the left. When I moved to the right, I switched it to the right. In addition to taking no time at all, the entire process was pretty much pain-free, unlike waxing and threading treatments.
I was a little more hesitant to use the device between my eyebrows, but the size of the openings on the head are so small — less than half an inch total — so there wasn't really any way I could mess my brows up (unless someone bumped into me and moved my arm). I stood close to the mirror, away from anything that could bump or move me, and in less than a few seconds, my tiny hairs between my brows were gone.
After using the device, per the instructions, I decided to apply a cooling moisturizer (I used La Mer's Moisturizing Cool Gel Cream) to calm my skin. The areas where I used the device didn't feel raw or sensitive, but I wasn't sure what my face was going to look like after a few hours and didn't want to take any chances. I was pleasantly surprised to see that at the end of the day, my skin was totally fine. I didn't experience any redness or irritation at all from the device, which can sometimes happen to me after I wax, thread, or even shave (with a facial razor).
I will definitely be using this device again to remove my facial hair, especially on my upper lip area. I could not believe how easy the gadget was to use and how quickly it worked. I also loved that I experienced no pain, no redness, and no irritation while using it, as well as after. I will still get my eyebrows waxed, as the device isn't great for shaping your brows, but will use it in a pinch when I start to see little hairs pop up in between them.
The Venus Face Perfection is a handheld gadget that can be used on the sensitive areas of your face, including your chin, upper lip, forehead, and between your eyebrows. It is not a razor, but an epilator that mechanically removes multiple hairs at once. The head of the device features 10 micro-openings that aim to pluck the tiniest, shortest, and finest hairs quickly from your face. It moves in two directions — left and right — so you can remove hair on either sides of your face more easily, depending on how you're holding the device. After using the Venus Face Perfection, the device claims you'll have up to four weeks of smooth, hairless skin.
That quickly changed after I turned the device on. The head began to spin super fast — almost too quickly. I was a little afraid to hold the device up to my upper lip area, so following the instructions, I tried it first on my chin to get used to how it felt. I pressed the device down onto my skin and it startled me at first — you can definitely feel the micro-openings snatching up your hairs, like soft little pinches. But after a few seconds, I got used to the sensation and decided to give it a whirl on my mustache area.
After using the device, per the instructions, I decided to apply a cooling moisturizer (I used La Mer's Moisturizing Cool Gel Cream) to calm my skin. The areas where I used the device didn't feel raw or sensitive, but I wasn't sure what my face was going to look like after a few hours and didn't want to take any chances. I was pleasantly surprised to see that at the end of the day, my skin was totally fine. I didn't experience any redness or irritation at all from the device, which can sometimes happen to me after I wax, thread, or even shave (with a facial razor).
I will definitely be using this device again to remove my facial hair, especially on my upper lip area. I could not believe how easy the gadget was to use and how quickly it worked. I also loved that I experienced no pain, no redness, and no irritation while using it, as well as after. I will still get my eyebrows waxed, as the device isn't great for shaping your brows, but will use it in a pinch when I start to see little hairs pop up in between them.
7 Steps For Traveling & Working Remotely, According To A Digital Nomad Coach
If you’re thinking of becoming a nomad, this is Backe’s advice: “Go into this with the same mindset you have when you're dating — take it slow, use your brain, trust your gut,” he tells Bustle. “If it's a fit, go to the next step. Better to go slow and make a thought-out decision than to make one you'll regret later on. It's pretty easy to test the lifestyle, though — make your way to the next state/province/country over, rent an Airbnb, and start making a new routine for yourself.”
The path toward becoming a digital nomad is a long and winding one, and you’ll have to read the whole book to get a comprehensive grasp of it. But in case you’re curious what the whole process is about, here are the basic steps Backe lays out. He also created a series of worksheets to help people through their digital nomad journeys, which are publicly available online and hyperlinked below.
1“Know Yourself And What You Want”
To help you figure out if you want to be a nomad in the first place, Backe created a worksheet with a list of questions like “What talents or skills of mine are going underused?” and “Am I happy right now, or is something holding me back from being happy?” Do some self-reflection to determine how a digital nomad lifestyle would fit with your goals.
If you're sure you want to do it, move on to this worksheet, which will help you decide where you want to go first by having you rate the importance of various factors, like how many other expats are around and whether you’re close to home. Obviously, you’ll also need to consider logistical questions, like whether you have a valid passport and where you can get a visa (or get in without a visa). Lastly, this worksheet will help you further narrow down your options by reflecting on where you’d like to visit.
Once you have an idea of what places might interest you, Backe recommends researching them on sites like Nomad List and Numbeo. It’s also a good idea to research the place’s political climate to figure out if you’ll feel comfortable and accepted there. Lastly, you can use this worksheet to narrow down your options.
If you're sure you want to do it, move on to this worksheet, which will help you decide where you want to go first by having you rate the importance of various factors, like how many other expats are around and whether you’re close to home. Obviously, you’ll also need to consider logistical questions, like whether you have a valid passport and where you can get a visa (or get in without a visa). Lastly, this worksheet will help you further narrow down your options by reflecting on where you’d like to visit.
Once you have an idea of what places might interest you, Backe recommends researching them on sites like Nomad List and Numbeo. It’s also a good idea to research the place’s political climate to figure out if you’ll feel comfortable and accepted there. Lastly, you can use this worksheet to narrow down your options.
2“Clarify Your Desires And Acknowledge Limitations”
Reflect on what about the digital nomad lifestyle most appeals to you and what places you might be able to get those things in. (Here’s a worksheet to help you do that.) It’s also worth considering whether you really want to be a nomad (someone who bounces from place to place) or an expat (someone with a long-term home in another country).
If you do want to be a nomad, you have five main living options: a host family, a co-living space, your own space, a house you house-sit, or an RV (if you’re not traveling across any bodies of water). When deciding what to take with you, consider your stuff’s weight, replaceability, and cost. What you can’t take, you can sell, give away, or put in storage.
To get an idea of how much money you’ll need, fill out this monthly expense worksheet. Numbeo can help you figure out how much money you’ll need in different countries.
As you refine your plan, you can use this worksheet to keep track of it. If you’d prefer to just test out the digital nomad lifestyle temporarily, this worksheet will help you figure out a plan and this one will help you evaluate your results.
If you do want to be a nomad, you have five main living options: a host family, a co-living space, your own space, a house you house-sit, or an RV (if you’re not traveling across any bodies of water). When deciding what to take with you, consider your stuff’s weight, replaceability, and cost. What you can’t take, you can sell, give away, or put in storage.
To get an idea of how much money you’ll need, fill out this monthly expense worksheet. Numbeo can help you figure out how much money you’ll need in different countries.
As you refine your plan, you can use this worksheet to keep track of it. If you’d prefer to just test out the digital nomad lifestyle temporarily, this worksheet will help you figure out a plan and this one will help you evaluate your results.
3“Making Money As A Nomad”
If you’re concerned about your finances, one strategy to make enough money fairly easily is what Backe calls “geo-arbitrage”: live someplace with a low cost of living, and get a remote job from a company someplace with a higher cost of living, which will probably pay you more than you actually need where you are.
Professionally, nomads usually fall into one of four categories: full-time or part-time remote employees, freelancers, entrepreneurs, or consultants/coaches. Whatever you choose, Backe cautions against the common trap of working so much, there’s no point in being a nomad. One way to make more time in your day is to limit the amount of time you can spend browsing the web or on social media.
In many places, you don’t have to give up the social environment of an office to be a nomad. Programs like WeWork and ImpactHub have coworking spaces all around the wold where you can meet like-minded individuals.
Here’s a worksheet to figure out what you want to do to make money.
Professionally, nomads usually fall into one of four categories: full-time or part-time remote employees, freelancers, entrepreneurs, or consultants/coaches. Whatever you choose, Backe cautions against the common trap of working so much, there’s no point in being a nomad. One way to make more time in your day is to limit the amount of time you can spend browsing the web or on social media.
In many places, you don’t have to give up the social environment of an office to be a nomad. Programs like WeWork and ImpactHub have coworking spaces all around the wold where you can meet like-minded individuals.
Here’s a worksheet to figure out what you want to do to make money.
4“Get Affairs In Order”
Give yourself plenty of lead time before taking the leap to becoming a nomad. Backe recommends two to three months to move out, get rid of your stuff, quit your job (if you need to), and figure out work. You may still need to choose an “anchor” person to get any mail still sent to you, keep some of your stuff, or do anything else you need. Some nomads choose not to move out and to keep their apartment as a “home base.” This could make sense if you either plan to use it often or could make money by renting it out.
Before leaving, Backe recommends setting up electronic banking, a Paypal account, and a Dropbox account, selling your car or ending its lease, canceling your utilities and internet service, canceling your newspaper and magazine subscriptions, collecting your last paycheck, unlocking your smartphone so you can put in a new SIM card if you’re traveling to another country, getting a checkup, researching how to get any medications you need in another country, downloading Whatsapp, Viber, and Google Maps, and — finally — throwing a going-away party!
Then, it’s time to book your travel. Backe recommends arriving at your destination while it’s still light out so you don’t have to navigate an unfamiliar place in the dark with few people around.
Before leaving, Backe recommends setting up electronic banking, a Paypal account, and a Dropbox account, selling your car or ending its lease, canceling your utilities and internet service, canceling your newspaper and magazine subscriptions, collecting your last paycheck, unlocking your smartphone so you can put in a new SIM card if you’re traveling to another country, getting a checkup, researching how to get any medications you need in another country, downloading Whatsapp, Viber, and Google Maps, and — finally — throwing a going-away party!
Then, it’s time to book your travel. Backe recommends arriving at your destination while it’s still light out so you don’t have to navigate an unfamiliar place in the dark with few people around.
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